Thursday, 31 December 2009

2009

Wow. What a year.

1. Acting course
2. Fear/Love Filming
3. Aisling's children in Edinbugh
4. Acting course - Glasgow
5. Zombie filming
6. End of GCSE's
7.Katy Perry
8. Various Camden trips
9. BBC various
10. I am a Great Man filming
11. Avenue Q
12. Avatar
13. Grownups
14. Two pints
15. Ice Skating London
16. Learning to drive
17. New Moon

 I tried to do a top 20 but to be fair I couldn't think of 20 things I've done that I can remember! SHOCKING because I know I've done millions of things! That's obviously why I can't remember them.

What I've learnt in 2009; Life goes on. Have bucket loads of ambition. Be determined and to be fair you can't go wrong!

I can't honestly say I regret anything from 2009, except maybe doing work when I say I will but that's never ever going to happen.

Admittedly bad things happen to people and you're whole life might change but there's nowt you can do about it so you've got to just get on with it and adapt, you never know it might be a blessing in disguise.

Resolution for 2009 - Do everything, take everything and enjoy it

Resolution for 2010 - Do everything, take everything and enjoy it more.

All that's left to say is onwards and upwards and meet me at the top.

Happy New Year.

Sunday, 13 December 2009

Wow. I haven't blogged in a long long time. Loads of things have happened recently. Nothing career based though which is annoying. School has become all consuming. Still finish on friday and I can get cracking with some other stuff.

I've lost my voice and I've got really ill which isnt too enjoyable. My tonsils are like enormous and I can't breath without coughing. So all in all I'm very healthy. Plague performance in acting either tomorrow or tuesday my hacking cough may prove to be a hindrance or a blessing we shall see.

It's actually got stupidly close to christmas without me noticing which I'm not too overjoyed at but yeah.
So I suppose this has been a pointless blog!  Just planning on chilling out now get better and stuff.

So yeah :D

Merry Christmas x

Thursday, 5 November 2009

It's About Time...

It's about time I let go of stuff tbh. I hold grudges, negativity and the sense of loss. I suppose everyone does - Just not me up until now.
At the time it goes straight over my head; doesn't bother me at all, it's not until I get to a point where I feel hugely stressed that it all surfaces again. Stress tears. The only time I EVER cry. some things have happened lately to me make me feel like utter shite and yet I still find myself adding to it. the way I am I suppose. I just had a great idea for a song then!

"Everything happens for a reason"
Yeah I just don't like the reason tbh! It's not good enough!!

There aren't enough hours in the day - I've felt like that before but with an end in sight thats the bit I don't enjoy. This stress is an ongoing stress that isnt going to let up! The sense of never ending is what I can't deal with! Other instances like this have been where it's been for something and then nothing afterwards.

I got told today I'd make a really good teacher. First time anyone's actually said it to me. I'm not sure I could do it. I used to think teaching was a cop out - I'm not so sure anymore i think its easier to become established but its that same ongoingness that I couldn't do.
I love the kids though I think they're awesome- I'm doing it for them "Children are our future" for want of better quotes. I just want to make sure that kids get the same from it as I did.

I'm so easily annoyed right now and constantly feeling like a spare part is just going to make me more into getting more out of the kids.

All this stuff HAS to help get into drama school right?
I also got told I'm "bound" to make it because I'm out there trying now. Dunno if i believe them!

i have this little stressed out noise i do it's only been around since like may - this feeling reminds me of the drama exam. Biggest difference is then I had support now the person who's supposed to tell you to chill is one of the main people who contribute to the stressing out!
It would just be nice to have some thanks for once, you dont need to say it because if you say it and dont mean it its meaningless. Just would be nice for her to not expect this level of stuff- i'm doing more than the rest of the world so lets not be adding any more stuff ey! OOOOOOO NO not with her LETS ADD SOME MORE CRAP ON TOP TO STRESS HER OUT LOADS MORE.

She doesn't get me at all. Generally I'm a very chilled out person but expectation is something i cant deal with. Up to a certain point aye expecting it will get the best from people but you can push people too far and I've gone past my line.!!!!!

The world would be perfect without all the people in it...

Tuesday, 27 October 2009

LONG TIME!

WOW masses have happened since my last blog. I've been a zombie- frickin awesome day! Really really sticky fake blood though but nothing would put a dampner on the day to be honest. The fear/love trailers have come out I don't feature in them though which is good! I can't really say I enjoy watching myself. Not good really when you want to be an actor. I can't really remember much of anything else that has happened. I'm pretty chilled right now. Busy and lots to do but nonetheless chilled! I like it this way!

PEACE x

Saturday, 17 October 2009

WOW

Well basically I've had one of the craziest weeks of my life! I met a totally amazing person who totally made me so much more focused - I've spent a few hours so far searching for good monologues and working on them. Before I wanted it to happen instantly now I'm more aware of the amount of time it takes.
Needing 48 hour days right now! It's fun.

My little dancers are so awesome!! I'll be blogging about them on monday after their little performance I'm like nervous for them! LOL

I've spent wayy too much money on plays this past month! LOL but I love it!

Anyways a quick blog - a rather pointless blog I must say but I felt guilty for not blogging of late! LOL I could have made some interesting info up but that would be even more pointless!

REALLY REALLY must get on with some work now! I keep putting it off. MUST STOP THAT! LOL

PEACE x!

Monday, 5 October 2009

Long time no blogging!

I've not written a blog in like forever it's crazyy!! Not really enjoying that bit. 3 auditions coming up which is exciting waiting on the scripts and stuff but it's all good. I spend my life waiting for people to email back. Not fun! LOL But half is lol! I've been voice resting for what seems like forever it failed today though. Didnt talk as much or as loudly as i usually do! Doctors wednesday to get a referal to the ear nose and throat peoples! Driving lesson tomorrow exciting stuff! LOL
First audition is this saturday so need to get learning the ole monologue. Drama clubs are all go now which is cool/
Chavham today with Hannah, Parris and Linzi the 4 of us is always cool. depressed at my money sitch though. auditions are for paid work though so we shall see ent it! Thing is i probably wouldnt even let myself spend it lol! Save it for drama school, a piano or my car lmao!

Pianos are the next thing to buy! LOL! Myself and hannah are right on it!!

Lines to learn for acting and drama then if i get these parts lines to learn for that. monologues to learn it's all go ent it! I love my life when it's crazy.


Parris and hannah are all go at the moment with hairspray coming up and the modelling stuff so thats exciting stuff for them.
I really want some recording equipment and a proper camera for media! Camcorders wont do our film justice lol! Ima try pull some strings!


Dunno what Walker was on about you could spend 100 hours editing! NO FUCKING WAY it doesn't take that long!
You get good actors you get each angle in 2/3 takes doesnt give you too much footage and you watch it all and decide she don't know what shes on about lol! Maybe i just think i can do it dead quick! I dunno. OUR FILM IS GOING TO BE AWESOME!! Need to write it up and find locations and stuff. How exciting!

Sourcing butterflies not going to be easy. Do they all die off by this time of year? LOL
IMA FIND OUT

PEACE x

Wednesday, 30 September 2009

17 again...

No I lie 17 now for the first and last time!
My life is crazy yet hardly any of it is what i want. I find myself in a really rubbish frame of mind right now.

I feel like the blog is the window to my real life.
I really want to be properly acting again.
I need to be properly acting again

Instead of waffling i'm now going to write a play.

"Original idea by myself and the wonderful Charlie" The quote I will use when mentioning it in my biography obviously!

So to help me with this any "not so happy endings" that have happened to anyone i'd love to hear!

Share the unlove guys and I'l give you love back! LOL

You're story will be in a play.

OH YEAHH!! I want to do an festival and take this play so it has to be exciting!

LOVE x

Saturday, 26 September 2009

Corridor 27

Film making debut

Our school doesn't have great cameras so don't be too harsh!


video Linzi Coulter, Laura Merryweather, Lewis Small and Hannah Warner

Saturday, 19 September 2009

Inspiration

Following the disaster that was yesterday I've found myself in a better mental position - probably because I had a good sleep! LOL
I am now going to embark on getting thy school shit out of the way - something I didn't do last weekend then full steam ahead on everything else I wanna do!
I'd write my to do list but writing a to do list everywhere just means it will never be done!

Short and snappy
Tis what I'm about these days!

Peace! x

Friday, 18 September 2009

I'm going in for the Kill...

Well I'm listening to La roux right now so i thought it'd be a good title.

i've had an okay day nothing overly exciting nothing overly rubbish. until about 2 hours ago I had an attack of the yr 9 me and I'm petrified I'm moving backwards and become a weirdo again.

I'm shit scared like never before I'm terrified I won't make it my horoscope said "around mid week you'll realise everything you've been working for recently isn't really want you want and you'll have a drastic change"
Basically I'm on this course now this is the path i've chosen for my life so fuck anyone who doubts me.
Fuck myself then yeah?

I'm too focused on the way out future for fear of living in the moment too much and getting stuck in a rut.
Professional stuff has come to a massive halt - the main reason I'm doubting myself.
I'm missing my determination right now and I don't know how to get it back!

"I'm going to be actor"
"yeah whatever"

The massive emphasis on the male form is driving me mad. I don't get what's wrong with me to be honest. I'm afraid of the C word. I don't want anything to be cute and all romantic. I don't want any of that shit. I want to have a laugh. I want to be acting not playing at it. that doesn't leave time for relationships.

I recently thought I'd found someone who really got how i think and felt the same way - turns out he's a dick too. Nowt was ever going to happen or anything but I was happy that it wasn't just me in the world who thinks never seeing the person you're with is great. he just thoguht it was great cos he could fuck as many girls as he wanted.
DICK

Reinforced that I'm not up for that way of life as of yet.

So as usual I find myself depressed on a friday night because my life is lacking in living and purpose.
Medway will be my downfall if I don't get out soon.
And i find myself being serenaded by the sound of my fucking mother screaming about fucking money yet again to my fucking dad. If my dad died my mum would still find something to scream at him for!

Want to get out! Want to get away! Want to get a life!
Need to get out! Need to get away! Need to get a life!
Will get out! Will get away! Will get a life!


I will stop doubting myself!




Thursday, 17 September 2009

Things I've Learnt of Late

  • I find public trasport extremely annoying
  • I want more out of life than I'm getting now
  • I don't know what I will do with the life I want once I have it
  • Constant boy dilemas piss me off
  • You never realise how much you missed someone until you get them back
  • Males never grow up they still think it's impressive to say"I shagged 2 girls are you jealous?"
  • I've begun to doubt myself more than ever before


The last poing about doubting myself more than ever has slowly enclosed me more than I could of ever expected.
I don't know why but I just feel like no one will ever see me for anything more than my age and where I live. In my head I'm none of these things and to be honest I don't look like one on the outside only when I'm asked for my age and I don't lie in their eyes you can see the shock then the slight air of patronisation.

I'm stuck in the middle too young for the adult world but too old for the childs world.

Today someone said to me "you're quite posh aren't you" I don't come from a particularly posh background my nans a huge snob if that counts but its not where you're from its where you'll end up that important. I use big words and people tend to zone out after I've spoke for a bit do I care? In my mind its a way of natural selection if they don't understand me then I can't be bothered to explain.

I find that when I'm at school I become very I need a backup plan and I need to think of other things. I tend to sway more to teaching when I'm at school to me though teaching is a cop out its for the people who didn't make it to the end, the ones who gave up. No disrespect to those who didn't quite make it or changed their mind or whatever but it's not me. I will not fail and I will not be a cop out! I will make it to the top of my game and I WILL be the fucking best!

i just confuse people slightly on the outside they see a teenager once they know me they see a middle aged person trapped inside this body. I'm not into trivial games that they play the going out getting drunk and spending the next week recovering just in time for the next one - It's not me!

There are certain people who just don't fit in I'm not sad to say that I'm one of them. Existing outside of societies rules and outside of the box! I just want to spend my life doing what I want and I accept that I don't completely have the knowhow to do it this second and I accept there is more to learn but back in the day you could learn on the job people were more willing to give the kid a chance - that doesnt happen anymore.
I heard a great story about a massive fashion designer hiring a homeless person for a 6 month internship - gave her a place to live and ultimately she because another big person in fashion - putting everything on the line for one person, just because.

I know that in hindsight I will probably look back on today and think why did I worry - or at least i hope I can, but i dont care.

Success is key, but right now I can't find the door!

Much love x

Monday, 14 September 2009

Mondays

Well the past week has been a wee bit crazy! I'm still speaking like a scot! LOL My attempt at the accent has still not improved! EPIC FAILURE AT IT lol.
School has been pretty cool awesome timetable of Media, Film Studies, Performance Studies and Acting - you may say wow they're extremely similar but fuck it!! I like it its what I want.

Deep down I'm petrified I won't make it. School makes me feel like this I'm not sure there's anyone who properly gets how I feel anymore. I have a front a front of yeah I'm a confident dick thats sure of herself and will do anything to get where I want to be.
I'm not a total fake because I will do anything to get there it's just theres only so much you can do before it ultimately becomes up to other people. I hate that! I'm a control freak deal with it.
I have OCD about open spaces they need to be uncluttered so ultimate creativity can occur!!

I'm scared that I wont make it and I feel like I'm shit I'm totally not after attention with this and its a thing thats in the back of my mind that maybe i'm too hard on myself but i feel like a joke.
i feel like when i say i'm going to be an actor people just go oh right and in their head they go yeah good luck with that you're shit!!
I think that as soon as i go back to school i feel like this simply because i feel trapped i'm not saying i'm not having a laugh but making a choice between school or a half working actor i'll take the acting. I'm petrified i'll end up teaching - i have nothing against teachers I wouldn't be in the amazing position i'm in without an awesome teacher and i wouldnt have the experience i have now i wouldnt have the aspirations i do now but i half feel like i've hit a wall and i really don't know how to move forward so i'm crazily going down other ways to find a way through - go into directing go into teching whatever its like im going to attempt anything.
it just feels a bit half hearted though when i look back on it hours later. i'm too like that i just think too much. I enjoy it at the time i have a laugh im into it then im like what am i doing this is crazy.

I wont give anything up though!!! I just take on more! INTENSE its how i live my life maybe its not intense enough. I like it to be so intense i get no time to think!!

I'ma keep bashing out ideas and keep pushing it i just hate distractions.
I hate feeling negative and I hate being scared of failure.
It makes me work harder though!
I WILL NOT FAIL
I WILL SUCCEED

I WILL FIND A WAY TO IN THE FUTURE SHOW MY THANKS TO EVERYONE I NEED TO!
I owe so much to everyone I've met every scrap of advice every negative comment and every positive one is stored in my brain along with useless bits of information about random people connected to the industry.

There are a small amount of people I can count on one hand that I owe this determination and desire for success to but i'm not sure they'll ever get how much i do owe to them.
A wee bit of faith in someone can mean so much and I'm not sure it can be expressed and understood. I'll find a way!

I'm so scared of not living up to what i've set myself.

But anyway i hate mondays!

Much Love x

Friday, 11 September 2009

Media

WELL basically eastenders was lacking! Poor acting from daniella westbrook. Honestly! don't direct her in a crying scene if she can't do it just makes her look RUBBISH! She looks like a pug no word of a lie!
But the little kids in it are awesome. I love the dude that plays Jay he's great!!
AND I love how it was such a typical eastenders cliff hanger with 5 suspects. only its a weak situation to have a clifhanger! you not think? if she was murdered or something it'd be great!
Janine wearing the money - shes an odd girl! LOL
Lucas - hardly a criminal mastermind FINGERPRINTS you idiot!

other than that Eastenders is just odd!!

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

Of late...

Well having not blogged in like forever - many things have happened

Went back to school - its good and bad
I have an awesome timetable.

This is actually like homework now - In media it means we have to blog! LOL
Yeah so went back and all that, having problems with clothing - not what to wear just what to wear that will be appropriate for the weather and I'm failing epically!

STILL not finished my script.
Its taking a lot longer than i thought - getting sidetracked though!

I chose my song for the music thing - The Box - Katy Perry! AWESOME LYRICS!

Needing to learn a monologue - unfortunately a blog in character won't follow! LOL


I've found that before I went back I thought that the sky was the limit and as soon as we've gone back i've suddenly become a lot more pessemistic. NOT IMPRESSED

Dance tomorrow - should be EXCITING
or an experience for all involved - me dancing = disaster! Christmas show is proof.

Feeling a lot more restricted at the moment and a lot more disjointed - this blog's showing that wayy too many gaps!

just random thoughts that kind of don't fit.

Yeah so going to piss off now next blog will probably a review of eastenders! FRIDAY'S EPISODE if anyone really wanted to know. It better be a good one!! LOL will not be impresed if its just like peggy goes "get out of my pub" and ian goes "just butter one slice of bread instead of two" and max is shaggin someone else. Maybe a storyline with tiffany in it - that girl is beyond cute!! she so wee and ginge then opens her mouth and is so loud! LOL
LOVE

ADIOS

PEACE x

Wednesday, 2 September 2009

in character - a random idea of mine! LOL - this is not me.

well today was cool. I taught Stuart how to blog. he didnt really understand it he really is useless with technology its hilarious. but I suppose he's cute in a weird way. I've not got bored of him as i do most of the time. I mean theyre really sweet but theres only so much you can take before they make you want to kill them. hes different though. he doesnt get technology and hes not very clever but he tries so hard bless him.he took me out today and paid for everything and stuff and not every guy does that. i once went out with one who tried to make out he'd lost his wallet so i'd pay for him. FUCKING CHEEK its not just that but then he whipped it out to buy popcorn! I wasnt impressed. that was before i strated to like geeky boys. you probably think its sad but at least i know they appreciate me. anyway better go Stuart said he'd phone me. I need to prepare myself for 2 hours of his stupid nicknames and I love you's.
BLESS.

I'll probably dump him after a while its get to the stage where i cant take it anymore.
We'll see what happens

x







P.S this blog is not true life - i dont know anyone by the name of stuart who is a geek albeit a cute one. therefore cannot be dumping him.


THIS GIRL IS BEYOND SHALLOW!!

Peace Guys x

Long time no blogging!

So erm yeah. I've not blogged in ages probably should have done.
Went camping with Hannah - it was interesting LOL and experience to say the least and a cold one at that. LOL Why is it that your nose gets so much colder than the rest of your body?
Had a role reversed mock wedding men dressed as women and vice versa. AN EXPERIENCE lol.

Got back not really done much since then. Currently watching Twilight on my ipod LOVE IT I really want a vampire boyfriend LOL! They look so exciting LOL. Basically if i ever met a cool vampire I'd want to be one! LOL

Designed a shoe the other day. Its obviously done by hand so it looks crap but the ideas there need to design the wee fruit on the comp just do they look better! So that's moving along.

Back to school Monday SHIT lol! I've enjoyed freedom too much!
But I'm a changed person I'm a LOT more determined than i was before a lot more opinionated - as if i wasnt enough LOL, I'm a hell of a lot wiser. I've learnt a lot about myself.
More than the fact I enjoy time by myself having spent a long time being able to think life through and stuff I've come to realise the importance of balance. not a general balance a personal one.

I've got more crazy ideas and stuff! They'll never leave me! I love them! LOL
Learnt half a monologue.
Audition friday and sunday.
Eyetest monday

HOW EXCITING! LOL I'll probably get new glasses that i'll never ever wear! LOL

CONTACTS ARE WHERE ITS AT.

Hopefully the auditions will come up with something and then school will be no more! LOL

Loving life! until monday!

PEACE x

Friday, 28 August 2009

It's been too long

I was going to wait until I got back from camping to blog only I'm bored right now so yeah.
I sorted out my myspace this morning - no one will look at it but I know it's there LOL!
Yesterday was results day and I think it's ssafe to say most people were pretty happy with what they got.
English - C, Additional Science - C, French - C, Statistics - C, Design - C
Maths - B, Geography - B, Core Science - B, Working Life - B, Drama - B
ICT - AAA, English Lit - A

Not too shabby!
I find when you don't care things happen and are positive and are productive.
The three amigos didn't care yet did pretty well!
Thing at MidKent today so yeah. Out for a meal later on. Hannahs then camping at the weekend.

Me camping how hilarious!! I've learnt to travel light though. I've only got a wee bag and 2 pairs of shoes. Oh how will I cope!!!!

LMAO

Better get a shift on need to check my list and find my glasses - Don't have a clue where they are!!! LOL


Still needing to learn that monologue though!!! I'll get onto to it at the weekend!!
At some point. Hopefully the weather will be good!! HOW SAD AM I LOL weather is so important! LOL

PEACE x

Saturday, 22 August 2009

In the light of...

In the light of seeing Suddenloss my rewrite is coming along well had to completely rethink it to cut 2 characters. They're still there but they don't make an appearance - there's a name for them that I can't think of.
Yeah so It's coming along pretty well, Still needing to learn my monologues I've made a definite choice on them now and I've been thinking of staging and shizz. Most auditions they just want to see something they can work with but I dunno about this one maybe they want to see a finished article just to stick me on the books. Oh I dunno!
I'm auditioning with a bunch of young 'uns so AHH lol! We shall see the ratio of pushy parents to pushy kids lol!

But anyway I've decided to cut a few of the scenes ones that aren't relevant and just to keep the length down and stuff.

I did say I would post a couple of scenes but due to this rethink they're not written to a good enough standard yet. A few more days and I suppose i'll post the first 3/4 scenes see if peoplelike it if not tell me and I can obv change it a bit!

So yeah off out now

PEACE x

Friday, 21 August 2009

Suddenlossofdignity.com

FUCKING AWESOME SHOW - so true to life well yeah as its made up of real life stuff. TOO TOO funny. Its like beyond words you just have to see it! shame its over tomorrow! I woulda gone again.I've had a proper good bit of theatre in like a week last friday Avenue Q - AMAZING this week Suddenlossofdignity.com AWESOME so yeah! Theres nothing like the amount of inspiration and determination you get from seeing people doing what you want to do and stuff! It's like you look and you're like that SHOULD and WILL be me in a wee bit! Which reminds me tomorrow is a day of monologue learning and script writing.
Need to get cracking on my current script idea - I'll post a couple of exerpts when it's finished to get some feedback on it. I'm thinking about shrinking the cast from 6 to about 4/5 I suppose I could have characters who are there just not in any scenes - does mean I'll have to rewrite a couple of scenes. HMM ideas guys??

I love this though my train of thought published for the world to see. not that the world cares but it's nice to know that possibly some incrediably bored boffin/drunk/unemployed person may come across my blog and be inspired! I THINK NOT but stranger things have happened! see other blogs for full details - I sound like I'm selling car insurance.

But anywho! Today was good no more than good a proper eye opener again - it's funny how detached from dreams you can get in a week its crazy. In London there just seems to be so much stuff to keep me on the right way of thinking down here theres nothing theres just SHIT.

Tomorrow i may tweet and I may blog but it wont be Oh i just had skittles - By the way I havn't incase you wanted to make a major story of that! It'll be scene 79 complete. NOT THAT IM GOING TO WRITE A SCRIPT THAT LONG. Do be serious. I'd rather have a 9 scene awesome script than a 99 shit one! QUALITY NOT QUANTITY! something I could never do in english but nevermind lol!

Oh yeah today I read a story about Daniel Merriweather and the fact he does coke in his own home. BASICALLY that dude that shagged his family and kept them in his celler didnt brag about it - what happens at home stays at home! That I can deal with no problemo! The headline on the otherhand along the lines of Daniel: Likes to get MERRI on cocaine!
I'M UTTERLLY OFFENDED how FUCKING dare they use the start of mine&his name for that! I want the fact I say my name's Laura Merryweather at auditions and i get back "oh are you related to that singer" not "oh are you related to that druggie" BASICALLY IF THE GUY EVER READS THIS - never going to happen I'd just like to say don't drag my name through the shit because even though it's not spelt the same stupid people still ask the question and theres no way to define an I and a Y when you speak.

Basically kids take my advice - If your last name's Merryweather/merriweather or anything of the like fucking jones/ smith anything DONT DO DRUGS - theyre dead expensive and you could buy some nice shoes with the cash!

I've had a great day today and I hope everyone else did in whatever they did today too!!

LOVING LIFE

PEACE! x

Thursday, 20 August 2009

Day Four in the Life of Laura Merryweather

Wow. Just now i thought I'd lost my blog but I logged into the wrong account TIT! but panic over this blog is still alive and kicking. First blog of today because I was waiting for some exciting news. Some designs done today not as much done but what can ya do! It's all good. Water aerobics tonight - feeling good right now!

A blog is soon going to get up and running for the fashion side of things. I think it's likely to be a video blog just so we can wear our stuff once its made and stuff! It shall be good and the whole world will see our ugly mugs! TIS ALL GOOD! LOL

Today had a good chilling sesh with hannah dearest. She epically fails at guitar hero! LOL!! Have a good time in butlins if you read this before you go!

Tomorrow off to LDN with my nan seeing suddenlossofdignity.com with Kathryn Drysdale so should be good. Going to whip out my monologues to learn on the train it's a hobby of mine! LOL I shall take eclipse too and pretend I'm in love with a vampire so should be exciting.

Loving life right now dead happy, I believe its time for some farmville and some tweeting. I may start a vlog soon to go with this just because typing seems to take so long! LOL I'll do some writing too!

USSAIN BOLT! Two words guys!

Feeling good feeling creative and most important feeling on top of the world.

PEACE x

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

Relationships

The title of this blog looks to be an oh I'm in love with this boy blah blah bollocks.

In the last hour a certain amount of things have occured to me
#1 being apparently people cant ACT as though theyre in a relationship without actually being in one with that person! SURELY as an ACTOR and theyre known as an ACTOR people would gett he hint that yeah this is just acting there doesnt have to be a big agenda and big oh theyre totally together and shit! I'm totally glad I'm british just because the whole american movie scene is so into that! Not saying that british paps dont like a bit of goss but its not on the same scale!
#2 In that sort of situation as above theres an intense relationship - people just get on, theres no room to not get on theres no room to not be able to find that chemistry because I think that if you take on that role and feel as the character would feel the emotion is there - theres no need for a real RELATIONSHIP to be there. It's also the same old argument that a boy and girl can't JUST BE FRIENDS which is sad. Because I do believe it can happen, no more so than when you have to act as though you're in love with this person because its so intense you go past any way of it really happening.
#3 Obviously to get this role where being in "LOVE" is so important if the two people didnt work together neither would of been cast, it doesnt mean these people have to then be thrust together.

WOW I CAN TOTALLY READ TOO MUCH INTO THINGS.

I suppose right now i've got ambition overload and I feel sorry for these people, who wants your news splashed everywhere. Celeb life is crappy if you've earnt it but if you've just popped out of a reality TV show its worse because thats why you're famous you're famous because you can bitch about people or you can eat bugs, or look like a man and sing like a woman or look like you've not seen a mirror for 10 years which was the last time you ever properly heard yourself sing and it was shit then - honestly it didnt improve.

This was a shitty blog, a pointless blog and most definitely didn't make me feel any less annoyed at the world.

But nevermind because ima finish off a scene.
OH SHIT I need a monologue!
FUCK NERVES JUST HIT ME AGAIN. I'm putting too much on this one audition, I'm making it too significant. BUT IT IS! AHH SHIT

PEACE GUYS!

Ambition IS THE key to life...

I suppose as Hannah and Parris have done these I need to wack out an ambition blog too! Just to complete it!

Ambition is the key to life and fulfilled life. I dont wanna ge tto 30 and be like OH SHIT I've done nothing with my life. The worst thing you can so to me right now is "you've got the rest of your life ahead of you" to be honest the rest of my life is a shorter life than if i start now. And I'm not saying the life I want is going to jump out and wack me on the head - because it's not it's something that you have to work towards and if I don't start now I'll miss my chance.

This year I said to myself " TAKE EVERY OPPORTUNITY THAT COMES ALONG" It's honestly the best adivce you can ever give anyone EVER as soon as you start to take opportunities more come along than ever before!
Yeah a couple of things have happened this year that I've thought I realy don't like that GET OVER IT basically I got over it and I'm here now. Everything that happens helps to shape the future you so every disappointment is for a reason and is a good thing.
School is shite! Basically I don't see how you can learn from someone who only made it to being a teacher. I wanna be at the top of my game and in my way of thinking a teacher is someone who never made it to the top. I wanna be around people who did make it to the top and are living the life I want to live. I don't want to be stuck in shitty lessons learning fuck all. i wanna be out there networking, performing being ME. In school they tell you to conform and TBH I'm never going to do that. The three amigos are the three black sheep in a field of white ones. It's in our genetics and there's nothing much we can do. WE are all born to do something - some are born to quit, some are born to only make it halfway. AND SOME ARE BORN FOR GREATNESS. Everyone can achieve greatness if you believe you were born for it!

Fashion was never my thing, I never thought I'd be signed to a model agency and I never thought I'd be a film, perform at Edinburgh castle in front of a massive crowd I never EVER would have believed that 3 years ago. And the next three years I'll never believe I would have done it now. I can't deal with people with no ambition, Ican't deal with people with no life ahead of them and I don't want them in my life. I'm not staying here a moment longer than I have to and BY FUCK I'll be glad to get out. I won't regret my time in the wee pond, BUT I'll be so glad to get out to sea. I'll spend some time getting thrown about by waves but I will end up bracing the waves and beating them.

LIFE IS FOR LIVING - TAKE EVERY OPPORTUNITY

AND BUY OUR CLOTHES WHEN THEY COME OUT.

PEACE!

Its a wonderful world!

Well. Today has been amazing! No word of a lie I've had the best day in a LONG time! Plans for the fashion business are up and going, creative juices are flowing tomorrow will be amazing!

it's been immensely hot so my nan and I tottered off to the local wine bar - I JOKE we tottered off to Moat Park and whilst sat in the sun on a bench - Which my nan fell off of! I sat next to this purse left by someone obviously. So being nosey and obviously with this persons best interests at heart "looking for an address :/" had a root through this purse. Driving license - with address on. this woman lived around the corner from my old house. Wilst looking for this address I found a photo of her kids - who went to my old school. WHAT A CRAZY WORLD and if that's not weird enough Whilst in the queue to get an ice cream as you do on a hot day! The woman in front of us was on the phone to the bank cancelling a card and because I'm so good at eavsdropping heart her say her address - the exact same one as on this driving license. SO my nan says Excuse me have you lost a purse - BEAR IN MIND that this was about a hour and a half later on the opposite side of the park. SO my nan has a chat with her - this woman is actually a care worker for deaf people, who lived around the corner from me, whose son was in the year above me at my primary school who was at that time in front of us it was great!! And out of that I got £20 quid BRILLIANT

Honesty is always the best policy!

Life doesn't get weirder than today!

So yeah I've had a brilliant day. LOVING Parris' blogs about life and shizz.

In response to that - I REALLY DONT WANNA GO BACK TO SCHOOL
My plan is - spend all my time working on the fashion and acting and shizzle! SCHOOL is just going to be something to be endured, never enjoyed and TBH Ima spend all my time annoying the teachers!

Well must get cracking on CV sending, monologue finding, script writing, designing and maybe a wee bit of farmville on facebook!

AND OF COURSE A MAJOR AMOUNT OF TWEETING.

PEACE

Day Three Part 1

Day three I fear I'm getting addicted to this now! AH. Basically going to spend my day writing and designing some tees - 6 tee designs so far and script plot written so theres no excuse anymore! I find the more I draw the better I get I suppose practice really does make perfect! GREAT!

Myself, Parris and Hannah's fashion business is going to be immense! Just need to get cracking really!
DEAD EXCITED FOR NEW MOON I saw the trailer in the cinema and even though I've already seen it I'm so overly excited!!

93 days!!!

SAD MUCH!

It's going to be a nice day today so Ima spend my time in the garden! HORRAY I love sun!

So yeah

PEACE!

Tuesday, 18 August 2009

Day Two - Part 2

Went cinema - saw Time Travellers Wife typical girly film! If I was in a crying mood I would of cried. I've noticed of late that a film where you know the ending isnt always bad because the ending can still surprise you. I suppose a sense of the enevitable happening even if it's not always happy is the reason behind that! SO YEAH that was good Rachel McAdam's ability to be 18 in one scene and like 40 in another just proves my theory that americans dont age from 18 to 45 then one day wake up and they're just old! But anyway she's about quite a bit now isn't she! Doing pretty well for herself. - I love that I say that like I know her! TWAT! But yeah success is what it's all about.
Still havn't found a good enough monologue yet! I'm bricking it and it's not until september! I'll be even worse if I'm not prepared so I WILL find a monologue and have learnt it before the week is out and will spend all my time just reciting it!
I think I've put too much emphasis on this one audition - I don't usualy get nerves - I'm nto sure if they are I think it's adrenaline mixed in I just want somethin good to come of it! It really would make this year the best year of my life.

ALSO known as the year I decided to make things happen - makes it seem more true if things actually did happen!

Part 2 of day 2 in the life of Laura Merryweather - that was supposed to sound a wee bit like BB not sure it did though I can't do the accent!

PEACE!

Day Two - Part 1

Blog #2 I feel I will slowly get addicted to this.
Right now I'm bored waiting for the phone to ring so I can spend yet more money without leaving the comfort of my shitty house.
My nan's discussing moving - Plus points are she will move closer to London
Negatives are she'll obviously be further away.
BUT THAK GOD FOR THE CREDIT CRUNCH
She can't afford to do it right now so chances are she wont do it until I've left shitty 6th form. Hopefully after one year! heres hoping ey!
Not impressed by my lack of social life.
Off to see suddenlossofdignity.com on friday which should be good!
Need to have learnt a monologue by then ideally!
ARGH

anyway PEACE!

Monday, 17 August 2009

Day One

Hey.
Yeah so first blog! Erm todays been pretty crap didn't do much enjoyed the sun a bit. I live in hope that tomorrow will be a better day! Cinema tomorrow and I need to get cracking on picking a monologue, then learning it and shiz! oh how I hate auditions - I suppose I need to get used to them tbh! LEARN TO LIVE WITH IT! If not I should give up on my career! Tee designs are going pretty well got 6 so far we shall see what Parris and Hannah think of them! Script writing's gone out of the window a wee bit need to get back on that too! Money situation is still lacking! I just dont think I could work for anyone! I prefer to be my own boss!! REALLY want to get back up to Scotland but as my money is shite! Its not going to happen! Oh well I'll try go up in October or something! Or maybe I'll drop out of school and have loads of time on my hands WE SHALL SEE! Been enquiring about owning a beach hut! Theyre dead expensive and you have to pay council tax! I'll settle for a tent! Which reminds me I want to go camping soon! Wait until I can drive though! DEAD EXCITED FOR THAT I'm going to be a great driver! I HOPE!

Calvin Harris - Ready for the weekend is great! Proper summery album!
Time Travellers Wife tomorrow!
Need to aquire some more books to read.

AND OH MY GOD! Usain Bolt! He has the best name ever because he really is like a BOLT of lightning! SMASHED the world record and kept on running for ages after! He is awesome!!

So I suppose this is the end of blog #1!

PEACE!